In His loving kindness, the Lord has most recently lead me to a place where, for the very first time in a certain area of great struggle, I have entered the vast wide open space that is Freedom in Christ. Today I have decided with great courage and determination to run out into the openness of this space with excitement and great expectation. At first stepping out there was hesitation.. for I have always, as a basket, been fickle. It is too easy for me to share my excitement about freedom and end up looking much like the boy who cried wolf when the next day I am again chained. But today I have decided that is indeed why Christ came! That hope may never dissapoint because Christ in me is the hope of glory. In fact some of that fear has always been of sharing on my blog, as Ive expressed before. But as I cracked open a new book, (Addictions: a banquet in the grave by: Edward T. Welch) , I stumbled upon these encouraging lines:
Our familiarity with the descent ( referring to idolatry, addiction, sin) should not make us think that we have no business helping others. Quite the contrary. Having known something of voluntary slavery ourselves, we are more patient with those who are ensnared. We are also more eager to partner with them and lead them to Jesus Christ, the One who liberates then and carries us out of the pit.
So here I am again. Writing to share with you my hopes, fears, struggles, laughs, reads, etc.. Will I be consistent who knows. Will this be the last time you hear from me until next May? maybe. We shall see. I can only hope suspense has gripped you and you have felt my struggle as I've dipped in and out in the last two years. After all isn't this what community is for to inspire, to encourage, to be honest, and for believers to point towards something greater than ourselves. So if your out there or just stumbling across this blog stick around, come back every now and then, who knows you may find we have much in common.
As of late, I realized finding myself in these vast, wide open spaces seems a little daunting. I find myself saying to the Lord well what do we do now? It seems there are a hundred things that can be done and a million ways to do them regarding the Lord. Figuring out what He wants me to do for the day, if Im not careful, can actually start to look like one of those terrible combination math problems from 6th grade math glass. You know the ones - eleven students put their names on a slip of paper in a box. Three names are going to be taken out. How many different ways can the three names be chosen..... UGHHHH hate these. I dont really care how many ways just pick the names so we will know whos chosen and who isn't. Anyway the Lord has been more kind to me than Mrs. Dunning, my sixth grade teacher was regarding my inability to figure out those problems, I know she meant well.
So I have been laying my day out before the Lord and expecting he'll show me which combinations is best and I have so far found him to be a most excellent planner. He knows me well. For example, today I was perusing other lovely blogs that have caught my eye over the year and as always I began to get a little envious lol yes i know rediculous but don't try to tell me when you look at other peoples life and projects in photographs you aren't simultaneously both inspired and jealous. I have to remind myself that a blog is simply moments captured... not the entire picture of someone's life. So after reminding myself of that and putting away the bag of mini reeses and pretzels I was binging on while looking at everyone else's seemingly more creative life I found myself saying " Ok Lord there must be a reason Im drawn to these blogs and someway that I can use mine for your glory and to be creative. And well If I heard Him correctly I think he replied with song lyrics because these words from Gungor came to my mind.
You make beautiful things you make beautiful things out of the dust. You make beautiful things you make beautiful things out of us.
So there we have it. I love beautiful things because God made me too. I'm drawn to Him through them. And because I'm made in His image I make beautiful things too. So I will share more things that are lovely and that stir my affections for my maker. perhaps I will end up both less envious and less prone to eating entire bags of reeses mini cups while simultaneously encouraging or inspiring you. We shall see.